Here comes dhe 12th..

Edwin's saying that he doesn't want a relationship so today's the day, 8 sept 2010, i'm starting to let him go. I'm merely granting him what he wants. Humph. Just hope it works out fer him.. I really need a good fuck right now. Argh. He's nortt my guy doesn't mean that we can't hang out together and have fun, it just means no commitment. Haish. I'm just really trying to be positive.. I can't step into the darkness again. It's too painful.

Art O level coursework is due next friday, so I need to stop slacking and have to start chiong already. But I really sibei no mood sia. Argh.

I really dunno what's gonna happen to me now mann, all I know is that I can't break down. I feel so numb.. Humph.

LittleMissAlicia.

Muaii Eleventhh! (:

Baby's talking to me again.. Since 2days ago, On tuesday.. Everything's fine. (: And he says this will never happen again. So all's good now I guess. (:

But I was wrong. Humph. I was being bombed yesterday night. Ohmygosh, baby wanted a breakup. I ain't too sure what's going on too mann. It's our 10th day together and you're leaving?! With all that i've done so far, how could I let him walk away from me? :/

Baby did mention that I was an annoyance sometimes, thinking about it last night made me realised that I should give him more personal space.. I was in the wrong. Sorry babyboy.

Apparently, we sort of have a timeout till monday after his paper. I really really hope that everything's gonna be fine again fer the both of us.

I haven been this happy fer a long time. And I haven been myself fer a even longer time. And all this is because of my baby, edwin.. I love him. I know I do, because i'm doing everything I can to support him and to be only his to have. I want my babyboy to stay.. Please dun let me fall down hard again..

Tenthh.

My heart is breaking. What's happening? I dun wanna lose my baby boy. I feel so afraid, and insecure. Please?

I really need to let go of daryl completely, and to do so, i need to let go of his promises. HAISH. And i will. From right now, i'm throwing him out of my life. Or else, it'll never be fair to edwin because i love him.. Like babyboy always says, the past is the past, we should care about the future.

I'm gonna live my life right again. Thankyou BABYBOY! <33

Dhhe Nine! (:

Just printed my art prelims pictures. Alittle small though. Humph. Anyways, still need to draw, so maybe i'll just draw bigger barhs.

Currently online with edwin baobeii.. Someone needs to study really hard soon. I'll only get to see him this saturday fer about 4hours lorr. Haish. Sibei she bu de sia. Humph. But i qort to be understanding and give him the support he needs. Since i chose to love him, dhen i'll have to finish the whole job.(:

He promised to come look fer me right after his last paper though. So i'll just wait lorr. By dhen, just nice would be my one week school break. So we cann go out.(:

Haish. My back's aching rather badly today. Wonder why seh.. Lawls. I sort of miss dance class these days. Dunno why but i just do. Just wanna dance whad my hearts desires.. Dun need instuctor or teacher to guide, just follow the flow of the song. Haish. Sort of regret starting counselling. Dunno lehx, i just feel so turned off recently by it. No point avoiding, i know.. but.. haish.

Anyways, tomorrow is english paper 2. Starts at 2.30pm, so need wake up by 1pm to shower.(: Shall skip lunch dhen. Hahaha.

I miss Deardear alot seh. Can't stop thinking of him. Everywhere i go, everything i do, i'm thinking of him. This afternoon wasn't so good. Baby boy went missing lorr. Message him never reply de.. Make me wanna cry only lorr. Kns. Hahaha. 4th day only, start to bully me le. Damn fast lorr. Heehees. Love my little baby boy loads.:D

Gonna stop here people. Take Cares~

LittleMissAlicia.

Eiight!

23rd August~ a new chapter is beginning fer me and Edwin.

Worked on 13,14,15,20,21 and 22 august at expo. Total pay should be $220 de, but i'm getting $250 instead. so shiok lorr. :D HAHAHA.

I REALLY ADORE EDWIN! He's like the cutest boyfren i ever had. HAHAHA. I so so can just be who i am when i'm with him. No pressure or what so ever. LAWLS. Hope that he'll treat me right and well, AND wholeheartedly. :D

Currently having my prelims this week and next. Recently started seeing a private proper counsellor. Dunno if it's working and helping nort. SIBEI SIANX SIA. ):

Missing My Edwin Deardear. :/

Love,
Cheryl Alicia Chua.

Muaii Seventh.

Baby has left me fer real. 16th may's the date. It's all over. Never again will i do stuff like that fer my guy. It's time to pick myself up and move on. But i just can't seem to do so. Everywhere i go, everything i do, reminds me of you. But i'm gonna move on without you.

I KNOW I DUN NEED YOU TO SURVIVE. :D

God Bless People.! :D

The 6th.

Last weekend was horrible. Me and baby just had so many problems, everything was going wrong and i felt like shit. But on sunday, my family celebrated my grandma's bday early and i qort her a rose! :D

Things between us didn't improve and i just qort so fed up and disappointed. When was the last time he picked me up or sent me home? He doesn't give me sweet surprises and sometimes i really wonder if i'm impt to him. But all in all, i know i love him. He'll always be my baby.

Midyears are here. Dun wanna study mann! So boring. But yet i want my results so i have to. Jiayous barhs. Well, qort to go! Have a smooth week ahead people! God bless! :D

5th Posttiie!

Sorry sorry, haven been writing. Ps. Anyways, yepp, i qort my N97mini as i hope. In fact, i'm blogging using it right now! :D

Hmmm.. Remember completing 3/4 of my holiday hmwks. Lawls. The first week of school was fine.. Oh oh and before school started, i went swimming with ben and daryl on saturday as planned even though it was raining.. Had fun though. :D

Hmmm.. Last week was very eventful though. Was down with a slight fever, cough, flu and sore throat. Left school after 2 periods and went to loyang point to see a doctor. Only reached home at 1pm. Had light lunch den ate my medicine at 1.25pm and was in lalaland by 1.40pm! The medicine was powerful mann. Woah. Had 2days mc but on weds i still didn't feel very well so i stayed home to sleep too. Went to school on thursday and enjoyed my catalys class alot. We'll had fun! :D Friday was good friday so no school. Went to have buffet lunch to celebrate grandpa's bday! Didn't have much appetite though. Went out to town with daryl in the evening though. He bought me a new dress! Really really liked it alot. :D

Den came saturday. I was getting baptism in the evening as a catholic. Had some problems with my mum but we cleared things up. Thanks ben! Fer all the prayers. :D Baptism was very making me nervous at first but calmed down slightly after praying. Now i'm finally and officially a catholic! Officially CHERYL ALICIA CHUA! Heehees. So happy. After everything ended they went fer supper and celebrate at daryl's place while i went to chomp chomps to eat before going home. Went to bed at 2plus. Next day woke up and reached daryl's place to find 5 other frens sleeping in his room too. Lawls! Den i joined them too. Had lunch with them den daryl and i headed to bishan J8 to watch Clash of the titans! Talking about movies, i caught How to train your dragon with him last week too! Enjoyed both shows alot! :D

Today school was fine.. Just that on this coming wednesday qort physics test so need go study. Wanna pass this test well! :D

With this, i shall stop here and go study. Will write again soon! God bless you people with a wonderful evening! :D

Muaii 4th Postage. :D

Today was a pretty hot day mann. Well, chinese tuition lesson was fine. And it's gonna be my last one too. So no hmwk was given. :D

Haven done much hmwk today. Currently at Dad's place. Grandma's cooking was good. Missed it quite alot. Should be going change handphone today. So so happy mann. :D
I really really like Nokia's N97 alot.

My boyfriend, Daryl, is here with me too. So glad he could make it today. And the best part is that he wasn't grumpy at all. :D

Anyways, nothing much to blog about today. Hmmm... hmwk group tomorrow though. Hope to finish my physics workbook and maybe chemistry papers.

Got to go folks! Enjoy the rest of the night. God Bless! :D

3rd Post And More To Come.

Today's weather is great mann. It's cooling and pretty windy too. Went fer maths class just now, 8 to 9.30am. Was alittle late though. Hahas. late by 15mins. Met krisna on the bus to school too.

Well, basically, yesterday's chinese mock exams sucked. Hahas. Boring and i'll probably fail it too. After that though, was AWESOME! Amar, Cheryll, Fitri, Hidayah, Hidayu, Khalisa, Syahirah, Nazrul, Naim and I went to places with MR RAHMAN. He rocks mann. Lawls. We went to NAFA(nan yang acadamy of fine arts), SAM(singapore arts muesuem) and Lasalle. Amar, Naz, Irah and i took mr rahman's car all the way while the rest took mrt. We practically rocked on the roads mann. Blasting the insides with music and speeding along the road was a thrill mann. Hahas. I enjoyed myself loads mann. He even made the car dance! Lawls. We had a hell of a time. :D

Last night, i had a long time talking to my boyfriend on the phone. Haish. I really hope he understands mann. I want him to always be here fer me, someone who i can really lean on when im feeling weak, someone who's gentle and thoughtful. Its the little little things that tell me that he loves me and that im constantly on his mind without me having to remind him that im his girlfriend. If only he could see how much all this matters to me.

Anyways, maths class was fine. Have another piece of hmwk to add on to my pile though. >.<

At least it's nort so hot today. Wouldn't sweat as much as usual. Well, will see when im coming to post again. Earliest tmr barhs. Chinese home tuition at 11.30am to 1pm and swimming on sat has been confirmed. And i heard that my grandparents are counting over to stay on friday. Thing is, im already packed mann. Humph. We'll see den.

Got to go get cracking people!(:
Have a nice day ahead and hopefully, you'll spread the smiles around. :D

Second Post On The Same Day.

Im back home since about 9pm. With the nort so good start i had this morning with my boyfriend who refused to wake up, the day didn't really improve either. After i pretty wasted and fruitless morning, (except fer this new blog).. i was already pretty sianx. So yeah. We went fer mass and stuff as per usual. But today i confessed to Ben, my godpa about a secret between me and my guy which i have been keeping from him fer the past year.

Although my heart feels lighter after telling, i feel hurt too. Thats because i know i disappointed Ben. It's nort that i dun wan to, it't just that it's really hard to. Moreover, im afraid mann. Truly am.

My guy dhen had to go fer a meeting in church and it was pouring heavily. I waited fer 2hrs fer him. Thankfully though, i had Nicole to chat with fer the first hr. The thing im mad about here is that, his meeting ended and he didn't text me to let me know. I was still waiting like a fool. I only found out when Elaine walked passed and told me. It's just irritating when such things happen. Haish. So i was hungry, cold and tired from the stuff that happened earlier and as the rain started stopping, he didn't ask me like where i wanna go or discuss with me or something.. when i asked him, he said to head home. I mean.. come on lurhs. Im hungry and we were at your place earlier on.. so we're going back dere again? Like Whad The Heck?!?

So yeah. But after that we were fine. We had dinner and we played pool. But my heart wasn't in the game. It was in my thoughts. Hmmm.. So it wasn't a good game i guess. And right now, this boyfriend of mine, is asleep again. Haish. But yet, who can i blame fer falling asleep? It's a human thing thing that happens. Humph. Im so used to him.

Well, im going watch the rest of Transformers now before hitting the sack. And maybe, hopefully, my guy wakes up or something because i know i do miss him and i wanna hear his voice. And to the rest of you out there, have a early night yeah? Sweet dreams and God bless you all. :D

My Very First Post Fer My Second Blog.

The reason why i started on this blog instead of continuing my previous one was because it died fer a pretty long time. Moreover, a new blog would also meant a new way of sharing my life.(:

Currently, i'm a 16 year old at Greenview Secondary School and this week's the holidays. Tons of hmwk to complete and extra classes to go to. My baptism rehearsal on friday and my classmate, Junyi is leaving sinapore on the same day at mid-night fer good. I'll miss her. :X

Right on at this very moment, i'm at my boyfriend's place using his laptop while he's asleep. Refuses to get up. Argh. And we still have church to go to. In fact, we're supposed to be there fer mass. Haish. So im like bored mann. Humph.

Thinking of my packed week ahead, i somehow wish it wasn't the holidays. I mean, whads the point of calling it a holiday when it doesn't seem to be like one at all. Everyday would probably be filled with the different hmwks and classes. ):

I wanna go out mann. It's like so boring these days. Nothing much fun happens.

Monday: Chinese Mock Exams And Nafa Art Outing.
Tuesday: Maths Sub Class And Art Extras.
Wednesday: So Far Nothing.
Thursday: So Far Nothing.
Friday: Chemistry Extra , Baptism Rehearsal And Sending Junyi Off.
Saturday: So Far Nothing. Planning To Swim Though..
Sunday: As Per Usual. Church.

This Is Gonna Be My Week. Haish. Think either wednesday or thursday will organise a study group with a couple of others to do hmwk together. So else, i'll probably never finish much.